When Reality Gets Too Real

Have you ever felt like this – your reality gets too real? Well, I have been here quite a few times. But this time around it has been a little different. It seems I may have levelled up.

It started with life’s realities hitting me and breaking me. I couldn’t get lost in my go-to worldly things. I tried my best to force myself to get lost in my happy space. But it did not happen. So, I stopped trying to escape.

I just let go. I felt myself drop to the bottom of the ocean. Usually, I always had one hand placed in God’s hand and the other hand placed on worldly sources of happiness like Music, TV Shows and Social Media. And these worldly sources were not only a want, they were a need.

But this time something changed as I lay at the bottom of the ocean floor. This time both my hands are in God’s hand. I don’t know when and how but it feels like I am above the water now, looking down at the ocean floor.

Now, I don’t just drop to the bottom of the ocean, I swim down to that quaint place when required. It is no more a desolate place where I fall to. It is a place of solace that fits into my reality. It is a place that has formed a part of myself and that I control.

 And now, I feel like I am with God. I stand next to him as we face a beautiful sunset, standing by the railing at the back of a Cruise ship at Sea, holding His palm with both of mine. I get lost in my happy space because I want to and not because I need to.

I look forward to the day when my reality becomes my happy space. But right at this moment – my reality doesn’t control me, I control it. And that seems to be a level up.